Hallelujah! Math, you will not beat me. >:)

Math was always my worst subject but I am getting a lot better in it. The silly thing is that negative numbers hold me back despite understanding far more complicated things. I got a terrible grade on my second math packet which was really upsetting so I committed myself to staying positive and studying online. Purple math is a great website for this purpose and well I was researching there it dawned upon me what I was not understanding before. It's like a wee little light bulb turned on because I remembered to flip  the switch. lol

Pharmacy work has a lot to do with math and even if the formulas aren't generally very complicated it is really important to me to have a sound understanding of what I am doing. There are times when school seems overwhelming and scary but I push past it and find myself better off each time. It's a big deal for me to be able to stay calm and focused in math class so going this far despite a big let down is really great. To get back up and figure out the problem is really a first academically speaking. 

Being in school makes me think of how one day I might have a new job and how in some ways that makes me sad. I work with a lot of really nice people who I enjoy being around. The work I do is certainty nothing I want to keep doing but I know that when the time comes to move on it is going to be hard. I would have to say that I have never got along with a group of people so well as I do here at this place. People are so willing to get along and I have so many friends at work supporting me in school which has been such a lovely helpful thing. When I get through school I'm going to have to invite them all to a party to show my thanks and probably cry a lot like a baby. >_<

Well that's about it. Things are going well despite a bit of a bump in the road.

Wow I can't believe it!

I really cannot believe how well I am doing in my classes. The material is really understandable and I dedicate a lot of my free time to studying so none of my tests have been to stressful.

Today we had are pharm intro quiz which I was worried about but to my pleasant surprise I got a 99%! I was sooo happy. In fact when I got my quiz back I pumped my fist in the air and said yes!! lol >_< After making a utter fool of myself class continued as normal...

It takes a lot of focus and positive thinking to not let myself get over whelmed like I did in the past. My anxiety issues really put a stop to me learning before and it's just a shame to know I did that to myself without trying. I pray about strength, focus, and confidence everyday because I do believe that I could never do this alone. God has been the reason my life has changed so much and why I am able to do what I am doing now. I could have never done this last year, it wasn't up until now that I felt ready for it academically and socially.

It just does not seem possible I could do this well it's as if I am watching someone else instead of myself. In high school I took Algebra 3 times because I just could not grasp it but now I am flying through my home work. Everything my math teacher says makes sense and I dare so I enjoy learning about it. I never felt smart not once in my life but now I feel like I can learn just like anyone else. I know if I work hard and stay dedicated I can do as good as I want to.

Pharm quizzes are epic!

Seriously after a explanation of what are first quiz will be I am scared! It's 50 questions and they ask some pretty intense stuff. The teacher says he grades fairly because he feels it's to much. I will be studying a lot for it more then anything else. I have a quiz everyday in medical terminology but there not nearly so stressful. I am excited to see how I did on my first med. term. quiz  but I won't find out until Monday and like an impatient child I want to know right now! lol

I am having a bit of a hard time with one of my class mates. She is a "know it all" and corrects me in class when she thinks I am wrong even at times when I'm right. It's like my worst nightmare when it comes to people. I really dislike people being conceded especially when they snipe at whatever anybody says. She may not be aware that this behavior is upsetting to me or others and for the sake of getting a long I would like to believe that is the case. Besides I am dedicated to studying hard, learning well, and getting good grades. Whatever sort of competition people want there going to have to compete with there self because I am just not interested.

So far medical terminology is my favorite class. I really enjoy learning the "language of medicine" and the different planes and regions of the body. Apparently artho means joint and itis means inflammation. Which means arthritis means inflammation of the joints. I felt so special figuring out what the names of medical conditions mean lol >_<  It feels good to be able  to understand something so easily that I enjoy. Biology was my favorite science class in high school so I guess it is no surprise I like this class so much.

There is a lot of homework and studying to do but I feel confident I will do well. I really want this so I'm going to achieve it no matter what it takes. I know it's not some dazzling bachelors degree or anything that amazing but to me pharmacy works seems really interesting! Now it's time to go pass out for a nice long sleep. I am super tired!

Week one, not so bad.

Being so anxious about school has led me to write a blog. I think it might be helpful. 

Honestly the whole day on the first day of school I was feeling dizzy and nausea. As much as I wanted it to go away it wasn't going anywhere. Of course I prayed and tried to convince myself things would be fine but it seems I don't believe myself. lol My first class was electronic calculator class which really confused me because I had no idea what we would be doing. I mean I don't need help using a regular calculator! It turns out they meant the type of calculator you do ten key on that prints which seems useful if not a little boring.Things were not starting off to bad, in fact I met a lady going for the same degree who has been very nice. It turns out we have all are classes together which I  think is kind of cool.  

There is only 2 other women going to school for pharmacy technician which surprised me but I also don't mind because there will be a lot more one on one help with the teacher this way in our specific pharmacy classes. There both nice thankfully and we seem to get along pretty well. Are intro pharmacy teacher is quite the joker and down to earth so I think things will be fairly laid back. 

I've never said this before but I like going to school. Unlike before where I was to anxiety ridden to focus I am now confident and focused enough to study well at school. I love to learn and I'm really happy that I finally can. I'm all excited for my home work so I can study it's really sad actually! I don't think anyone should be happy about that!